Makeshift Heart III

for H

You heard when she said what he did, afraid
Remained when he did what he did, delayed.
Helplessness is an art form, an air raid:
Start, and a muddle, an ending betrayed.
Live through this and death is nothing, sister
Some things pale somethings sit and fester
No idea what living average cost her
Tripping through the office, an impostor.
We slide and we borrow and we wake
Give an hour for every moment we can take
Daily participate in that mistake
Get up and slide and borrow, and fake.
All witnesses, professional and not
Participate anyway in the plot.
Shadow my shadow my widow my murderer
Regret my egret in the field of complaint
Callow my fellow and hollow the wanderer
My family witnesses, none is a saint.
Action if prison if action if warren:
Rondelet gaol and sonnet retreat
Take me to places I do not intend
Sacrifice gently or give up abrupt.
Who reads the papers who writes the papers:
Capulet-Montague baby instead;
Here comes the Chopper to chop off your fingers –
Inkwell of history or another man’s blood.
Hush, hush child. No one is better.
Just thorns upon roses I grew for my mother.

Lift your feet as you tread through the long stalks
Take the hill low, down now, and slither boy
In a bunny ear the very plant talks –
So knee backs burn, it’s the marvellous ploy.
Something else, something even grateful, carved:
Scrimshaw of action, sayings carved
On love and ego even in blood carved
Still witness, false agency, if heart carved.
Lasing memory, no object sintering
(Swan dusk and gold whiting its own reward)
Is the hunt or fish standing still still standing
Decide recreation or cave coward?
Hush, you hush you child. No one gets better
Impossibly murdering their father.

Do the sing do the song of my ancestor
Just because we do Mambo Toraja
Step swing step up boy and step swing return
Flappy just happy in the grip of the past –
Saw nothing then do nothing now
Lordy, hush, I’m home at last.

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